Our man, Gaston the Gator … what a crazy little scaly mascot we hired! He’s glad he left his home in da bayou, he tells me … he says he’s happy living in the big city of New Orleans, and being our mascot. BUT IT’S WEIRD!! he yelled one day last week. He was really upset.
At first, I just said mm-hmm, but then I decided to ask him what he meant. Well, he says, I was slithering around the French Quarter on my day off the other day … and I saw a really OLD CEMETERY! OH, MY GOSH – IT WAS SCARY, he exclaimed!!!! People there told me that it was named St. Louis #1 cemetery, and that it is the oldest one in New Orleans. I asked them how old??? They said 1789! Ooooooooh, I thought!!! Betcha there’s lots of hoodoos in there!
When they told me that they don’t allow alligators in the cemetery, I couldn’t believe it! Who do they think they are? I don’t condone alligator discrimination, so I waited until they closed. Ha, ha!!! They can’t keep me out!
Gaston told me that he slithered under the gate, and was stunned at what he saw. There was the tomb of a famous VOODOO PRIESTESS! He read the name on the tomb: Marie la Veau. Wow, just hearing that name made him shudder. (And it’s hard for alligators to shudder!) He got goose bumps all over his scaly little body. Seems she is very well known in the city, even though she died well over 100 years ago. DANG!!! he thought! I’M OUTTA HERE!!! He scrambled back under the gate, he said, because he was scared that she might put a hex on him!! I told him to calm down, and not to worry about Marie.
When he relaxed a little, he told me he saw a tomb shaped like a pyramid. How stupid, he said! Why would someone have a pyramid-shaped tomb built? I know no self-respecting alligator would, that’s for sure. The inscription read Nicolas Cage, who is supposed to be some famous actor. Well, I’ve never heard of him, so he can’t be that famous! And he must be a real weirdo, too. You’re right Gaston!
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